After several years of studying and hard work, I have finally learned scientific jargon. The following list of phrases and their definitions will help you to understand that mysterious language of science and medicine.

1. IT HAS LONG BEEN KNOWN
Translation: I didn't look up the original reference.

2. A DEFINITE TREND IS EVIDENT
Translation: These data are practically meaningless.

3. WHILE IT HAS NOT BEEN POSSIBLE TO PROVIDE DEFINITE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS
Translation: It was an unsuccessful experiment, but I still hope to get it published.

4. THREE OF THE SAMPLES WERE CHOSEN FOR DETAILED STUDY
Translation: The results of the other samples did not make any sense.

5. TYPICAL RESULTS ARE SHOWN
Translation: This is the prettiest graph.

6. THESE RESULTS WILL BE IN A SUBSEQUENT
REPORT...
Translation: I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded.

7. THE MOST RELIABLE RESULTS ARE OBTAINED
BY JONES"
Translation: He was my graduate student; his grade
depended on this.

8. IN MY EXPERIENCE.
Translation: Once

9. IN CASE AFTER CASE
Translation: Twice.

10. IN A SERIES OF CASES
Translation: Thrice.

11. IT IS BELIEVED THAT
Translation: I think.

12. IT IS GENERALLY BELIEVED THAT
Translation: A couple of other guys think so too.

13. CORRECT WITHIN AN ORDER OF MAGNITUDE
Translation: It's Wrong.

14. ACCORDING TO STATISTICAL ANALYSIS
Translation: Rumor has it.

15. A STATISTICALLY ORIENTED PROJECTION OF
THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THESE FINDINGS:
Translation: A wild guess.

16. A CAREFUL ANALYSIS OF OBTAINABLE
DATA
Translation: Three pages of notes were obliterated
when I knocked over a glass of beer.

17. IT IS CLEAR THAT MUCH ADDITIONAL WORK
WILL BE REQUIRED BEFORE A COMPLETE
UNDERSTANDING OF THIS PHENOMENON OCCURS
Translation: I don't understand it.

18. AFTER ADDITIONAL STUDY BY MY COLLEAGUES
Translation: They don't understand it either.

19. THANKS ARE DUE TO JOE BLOTZ FOR
ASSISTANCE WITH THE EXPERIMENT AND TO
ANDREA SCHAEFFER FOR VALUABLE
DISCUSSIONS
Translation: Mr. Blotz did the work and Ms. Schaeffer
explained to me what it meant.

20. A HIGHLY SIGNIFICANT AREA FOR
EXPLORATORY STUDY
Translation: A totally useless topic selected by
my committee.

21. IT IS HOPED THAT THIS STUDY WILL
STIMULATE FURTHER INVESTIGATION
IN THIS FIELD
Translation: I quit.