Dyrk Schingman, Oregon State University
After several years of studying and hard work, I have finally learned scientific jargon. The following list of phrases and their definitions will help you to understand that mysterious language of science and medicine.
1. IT HAS LONG BEEN KNOWN
Translation: I didn't look up the original reference.
2. A DEFINITE TREND IS
Translation: These data are practically meaningless.
3. WHILE IT HAS NOT BEEN
POSSIBLE TO PROVIDE DEFINITE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS
Translation: It was an unsuccessful experiment, but I still hope to get it published.
4. THREE OF THE SAMPLES
WERE CHOSEN FOR DETAILED STUDY
Translation: The results of the other samples did not make any sense.
5. TYPICAL RESULTS ARE
Translation: This is the prettiest graph.
6. THESE RESULTS WILL
BE IN A SUBSEQUENT
Translation: I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded.
7. THE MOST RELIABLE
RESULTS ARE OBTAINED
Translation: He was my graduate student; his grade
depended on this.
8. IN MY EXPERIENCE.
9. IN CASE AFTER CASE
10. IN A SERIES OF CASES
11. IT IS BELIEVED THAT
Translation: I think.
12. IT IS GENERALLY BELIEVED
Translation: A couple of other guys think so too.
13. CORRECT WITHIN AN
ORDER OF MAGNITUDE
Translation: It's Wrong.
14. ACCORDING TO STATISTICAL
Translation: Rumor has it.
15. A STATISTICALLY ORIENTED
THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THESE FINDINGS:
Translation: A wild guess.
16. A CAREFUL ANALYSIS
Translation: Three pages of notes were obliterated
when I knocked over a glass of beer.
17. IT IS CLEAR THAT
MUCH ADDITIONAL WORK
WILL BE REQUIRED BEFORE A COMPLETE
UNDERSTANDING OF THIS PHENOMENON OCCURS
Translation: I don't understand it.
18. AFTER ADDITIONAL
STUDY BY MY COLLEAGUES
Translation: They don't understand it either.
19. THANKS ARE DUE TO
JOE BLOTZ FOR
ASSISTANCE WITH THE EXPERIMENT AND TO
ANDREA SCHAEFFER FOR VALUABLE
Translation: Mr. Blotz did the work and Ms. Schaeffer
explained to me what it meant.
20. A HIGHLY SIGNIFICANT
Translation: A totally useless topic selected by
21. IT IS HOPED THAT
THIS STUDY WILL
STIMULATE FURTHER INVESTIGATION
IN THIS FIELD
Translation: I quit.